The one word answer to how I felt about my life. I want to be able to experience everything life has to offer, but as my body deteriorates I find myself less and less able to do the things I have always wanted. My mind is following my body in slow motion. Racing thoughts, sad memories, and a lot of nostalgia.
I remember the beautiful, the ugly, the guarantees, and all my insecurities. I write my heart out these days and I sketch great and terrible things. I'm draining myself of everything I can before the doctors tell me it is my time to go. I want to leave something in this world. I want to leave a brilliant memory. I want to leave myself behind.